Sunday, August 7, 2011

Am living in the midst of an enormous amount of work related stress. Trying to think and feel past that to the real work I want to do when I retire at the end of the year.

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I've been trying to write seriously (often failing, sometimes seeing a glimmer of hope) since the 1970s. Barb and I got married in 1976. I've been working at the Health Dept. since the spring of 1977. Our first child was born in 1978. Our second in 1984. We have two grandchildren now. All of this is to say that what writing, editing, publishing, etc, I've done so far has been done in the context of a very busy life. I put out The Difficulties when the kids were little and we had no money to speak of. I begged and borrowed and scrimped to do The Diff's. I even sold a life insurance policy. I could go on... The point, I guess, is that the pursuit of poetry hasn't made my life easier. It has, though, made it better.

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I'm hoping, when I retire, to write daily. That would be such a sweet luxury. I have an idea for a novel called "Appearances" which I think I can write (if granted an open expanse of time).

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Earlier today, after doing dishes, vacuuming floors, and eating lunch (fried clams), I read the manuscript of my friend Jessica Grim's latest book of poems. I've known Jessica for around 20 years. She's an engaging person and an incredible poet. Jessica's poetry is not flashy. It's thoughtful , quirky and kind of dense. It's a poetry of epistemological and phenomenological turns. It's a poetry of encounters, a poetry of interfaces, a poetry about the word inside of the world, where nature and thought are equally palpable and similarly fragmented. It was a privilege to read this work. Seek out her writing. Read it slowly and savor it. I'm telling you it's special.


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2 comments:

  1. probably everyone else knows these things about you but being a new comer, i appreciate the delineation. i think, by the way, retirement is never like what one thinks it will be because it's about time, personal relationship with time - and time is even more slippery/ enigmatic/ controversial/ elusive than words...

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  2. I'm sure you're right about time, Rosaire. But I long for release from the repressive constraints of the past 34 years and hope that I can manage an alternative path with whatever time might remain. Disappointment and joy march hand in hand, no doubt about it.

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